what a beautiful day

or sort of
now it's not
that good.

i expected
to see my older

i wanted to hear
about his trip
to nyc.

i wanted to
see the

i wanted to
eat together
and talk.

But whatever, it was Valborgs yesterday (school off, today too) and I guess he's just hangover as fuck and really needs sleep.

I had a fantastic day yesterday, so fantastic I don't think I ever wanted it to end.
There was the right amount of alcohol and cigarettes and whatever makes you enjoy life. Everyone looked lovely under the sun and I got to spend time with you.

I sat on the bus home this morning wondering about how much my life had changed because of someone I had spontaneously met exactly a year ago.
How awful I felt and how I thought I was actually not going to be able to feel okay again.
How all I wanted was to be with him again and how he obviously didn't give a shit.
How I sat in my room and silently cried till I fell asleep.

It actually sends a shiver down my spine and makes me slightly sad rereading and spell-checking this. I'm just glad I feel fine and there's no emotional attachment to that someone who made me have some of the worst days of my existence.

I just hope you don't do the same as he did.

Lets not be all depressed and emotional. I think I shall go sit in the sun for a bit now.

Have a lovely tuesday! And go get some sun xxx