"What's it like?" she asked her. "To have found her, to finally realize she's the one who will stand by you no matter what?". "It's extremely scary. I feel vulnerable, really" Cecilia replied. "What happens when I no longer have her? I feel lost when she isn't around. It fucking hurts when she leaves to do whatever she has to do. I mean, I wish her and me could just lay in bed all day every day and talk and drink green tea. I then feel safe, with her by my side, certain that it is very unlikely that something might happen to her, to this precious human being with whom I can no longer live without. And I mean that literally. Its like she's this amazing drug and I am the biggest addict". "Fuck, I can't tell whether I'm jealous of you two or whether I'm glad I'm not in your position". "Well, I'm the happiest I've ever been. And everyday is just perfect. But when she's fallen asleep and I lay awake, I think "This can't possibly last forever" and that scares more than you can imagine. I wish I could spend eternity with her, it probably would be the only way to get this constantly horrifying and discomforting feeling out of me".
Cecilia was born in a small town close to São Paulo. She never quite understood why exactly she was born there, but it was something to do with her parents and some luck related witchcraft they had going on around that time. Her parents were like that, they had "stages", like teenagers do: they just never really stopped having them and she never really knew what was coming next: one year, they visited all major cities in Japan and learned everything there is to know about Japanese cooking and then they built a small house in the middle of a forest with no running water or electricity and lived there for a whole year to "open up the soul". But her parents are a whole other story. This is about the day she met her and how it got like this.
