NARKOS

Today I was put to sleep for the first time.

And then I woke up not knowing where I was and with this blue thing wrapped around my wrist. Now it's swollen and it hurts if not over my heart. And these white stickers which had the purpose of keeping my heartbeat and pumping weird stuff into my system won't come off. A funny experience I should say.

I should stop writing and take a pain-killer. My hand hurts.

October, October, such an interesting month.


/skadad

Do I wanna know____?

October, october, october.

The faint pink color from the screen hits my room and my clothes and its melancholic.
I love october. Yesterday I was at a loud concert with loud music and good looking danes, I should move to copenhagen and kiss danish boys.
Today I was with her and we walked around in a cold malmö and talked about life and men and boys and us. And places, where we might one day go. Hopefully together.
And so tomorrow I will wake up and drink two cups of tea for breakfast and shower at 5 in the morning. All day spent at the hospital. Excitedly nervous.
Friday I just dont know and october is a peculiar month and I wish I was in love.


//s

today

just not super excited
i almost cant be bothered with it

work

Its one in the morning and I'm tiredly looking for work.


so tired.

what do I even want?


/S

why cant i have faster internet?

So I can download season 2 quicker?

/s

tuc tuc

1.
blonde
average-height
beautiful
simple
honest
funny
good-hearted
smart
hard-working
close

2.
dark blonde
difficult
close
uncomprehensible
caring
lost

3.
beautiful
special
amazing
funny
good-hearted
honest
simple
easy

4.
honest
caring
lovely
tall
there
easy

5.
smart
complicated
interesting
caring



/s

my face today

As I sit here, in my living room, on a rather unconformable chair, I have lived 6556 days. This what I look like on my 6556th living day, fresh from the first selfies ever taken on my new laptop.

Things are ok but I need to get through my very first play analysis and it really isnt the easiest thing ever. Although I must admit I've done worse and this is actually kind of fun, but nothing like the useless format writing I did last year.......



Now that i think about it, do I even look like the person who writes the stuff on here?

/s

Ollé is not a poem

My fingertips taste of iron
And the cold is starting to rush in

First through my shoulders
Finally down to my spine

The wine moves slowly,
Past every vain, every thought
Every feeling ever involved

Every memory ever remembered
Every person ever so close

And so the car comes by again, 

The same strange man
Wishing in vain 

What will be of me?
Of you?
Of us?
Of everything I ever thought of?

And so I write to not forget 

In the end,
She denied it all again.

Reading

I have a problem.

And its quite problematic.

They mess me up because I take too long to finish them. And then I sit here wondering what to do because that tiny little world I had for so long is finished; it will never be anything more after that last read page.

//"Alma"

things i need to do

basics:
get my shit together
get my shit together
get my shit together

basics 2.0:
get over myself
buy course literature
stop spending so much fucking money
get my shit together
buy a bookshelf
stop spending money
go work out
read my course literature
stop fucking people over
stop letting people fuck me over
get over myself once more
maybe find a fucking job

basics 2.01 deluxe version:
have a job
have my shit together
pass my courses
have money and not spend it on only expensive food
be a nice person
sleep properly

basics 3.0 final golden deluxe version:
get over yourself goddamn it